Duds of 2008: Part Seven

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less.

Black Butterfly (2008, Atlantic) Buckcherry's fourth studio album. *

The anti-party album, full of disgusting music and lyrics fit for the white trash that embraces comedy of the likes of Larry the Cable Guy.


Ten Kens (2008, Fatcat) Ten Kens' first studio album. **

Starts off with a bang, but gets muffled by its own confusion. Art-rock is supposed to be arty, this is just contrived.





Child Bearing Man (2008, Absolute Kosh) Little Teeth's first studio album. **

Music only hippies can enjoy, and I know that they will. Little Teeth can tap into a select portion of the Avett Brothers' audience. Beyond that, this is nonsense.

Duds of 2008: Part Six

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less.

Recovery (2008, Yep Roc) Loudon Wainwright's nineteenth studio album. **

Loudon isn't bad, he's just cheesy. It's not the music that screws him, it's his own clumsy lyrics that rarely prove to be insightful or funny and instead come off simply bland.

Red Letter Year (2008, Righteous Babe) Ani DiFranco's seventeenth studio album. **

DiFranco has banked on her lyrics over her music time and time again. While fans may soak it up, the routine is quickly a tired one. Her political sights are few and far between and her love songs aren't believable.

Clouded Staircase (2008, Bar/None) Starling Electric's first studio album. **

Clouded Staircase plays more like an extensive demo tape than an album; eighteen songs who average at about two to two and a half minutes. These guys have talent, but this finds them scrambling to be an updated and less enthusiastic version of the Beatles.

Duds of 2008: Part Five

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less.

12 Steps (2008, Defend) Tittsworth's first studio album. **

Tired beats interspersed with bits of untalented rappers being unbelievably cliche and stereotypical. Dance/rap that only nerds will identify with once the cool kids get tired of it.


Waiting for the Sun (2008, Secretly Canadian) David Vendervelde's second studio album. **

Unfortunately for Vandervelde, he can't sing worth shit. Some will find his voice intriguiging, but it's almost as annoying as Geddy Lee's. His songwriting isn't bad, but there's certainly nothing memorable about it, either.

The Old Days Feeling (2008, Modern Radio) Mirah's ninth studio album. **

Mirah's brand of anti-folk isn't nearly as clever or interesting as Regina Spektor's, and her unorthodox song structure and length aren't original in the way she thinks they are; she's different for the sake of it, not because she actually is.

Duds of 2008: Part Four

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less. Didn't expect to have to do it again so soon, but man, there's a lot of bad music out there.

Scars On Broadway (2008, Interscope) Scars On Broadway's first studio album. *1/2

Scars On Broadway don't know if anyone takes them seriously, if they want to be taken seriously, or even if the band takes itself seriously. In fact, they don't seem to know much, including how to write music or that there's more than one chord you can play on a guitar, or, in their own words, how they're going to live forever if they're going to kill each other. They said it, not me.

We Have Cause to Be Uneasy (2008, Canvas Black) Wild Sweet Orange's first studio album. **

You know the people from Wild Sweet Orange, you've seen (but hopefully have not heard) them a million times; young pseudo-hippies who "get" music and "connect" with it more than other people, who boast of quasi-intellectual ideas and made-up memories, but it's okay, because it's all in the spirit of music. The problem? They suck.

@#%&*! Smilers (2008, Superego) Aimee Mann's seventh studio album. **

Nothing against Aimee Mann. Honestly. But this album is boring beyond belief. Look, in a world that is plagued with mediocre and stereotypical female singer-songwriters, you need to stand out. Insinuating a potty-mouth word in the title of your album isn't what I had in mind.

Duds of 2008: Part Three

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less.

O (2008, Team Love) Tilly and the Wall's fourth studio album. **

Ultimately dry, a very disappointing album from a band that has potential to be a decent underground band. Sure, they're respected there, no doubt. But they could be good.


Partie Traumatic (2008, Columbia) Black Kids' first studio album. **

For anyone who ever entertained the thought of a B-52's and Roger Waters collaboration... and enjoyed it.

Can't Stop Won't Stop (2008, Fearless) The Maine's first studio album. *

Remarkably uncatchy and predictable. The unhookiest hooks since Lit. What more can you say about a band who tries to make an anthem statement with "She makes me feel like shit"?

Duds of 2008: Part Two

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less.

Here We Stand (2008, Island) The Fratellis' second studio album. **

The crunch of an electric guitar hardly matches the light pop of 60's groups such as the Animals, so the attempt that the Fratellis make is painstaking. The girl can't help it, and I doubt she can stand it, either.

One of the Boys (2008, Capitol) Katy Perry's first studio album. *1/2

See The Problem of the Katy Perrys

Simple Plan (2008, Lava) Simple Plan's third studio album. **

The same old shit from a band in a bad genre. I give them some respect because they haven't gotten ambitious.

Duds of 2008: Part One

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less.

Robotique Majestique (2008, Trashy Moped) Ghostland Observatory's third studio album. **

They’re certainly not Daft Punk, in fact, they’re hardly anyone. The dry beats and empty sounds of Robotique Majestique are only worsened by the strange ambient synths. The high-pitched vocals add another layer of strangeness to the mix. Overall, the songs are hollow-sounding and boring. Pathetique.

A Twist in My Story (2008, Glass Note) Secondhand Serenade's second studio album. *

Firsthand bullshit.

Keep It Simple (2008, Lost Highway) Van Morrison's thirty-fourth studio album. **

Van Morrison deserves an immense amount of respect and reverence. His early works, most notably Astral Weeks, Moondance, and Tupelo Honey stand among some of the greatest albums ever. That being said, Van Morrison sounds like an old fellow here, and instead of still offering fresh and exciting views like Dylan still can, he has instead put out a by-the-numbers, formulaic jazz-rock/blues-rock album.