Brazilian Girls - New York City

New York City (2008, Verve) Brazilian Girls' third studio album. ****1/2

The band famous for only having one girl and not being Brazilian in the slightest have released their third album, a masterpiece entitled New York City. Sabina Sciubba, the lead singer and only female of the group, is essential to this album. Her vocals can hit any emotion she wants with only the slightest change, and the fact that she sings in (at least) English, Spanish, and French only heightens the aura of mystery about the band. I cannot find lyrics for this album yet, so I am in the dark for quite a bit of the album. Sciubba can be super sexy as on "Internacional" or plead with whimpers like she does on "Nouveau Americain." And it's not just about sounding sexy, she can honestly sing. Her Sigur Ros-esque vocals on the opener "St. Petersburg" or her soft, sensual performance on "L'Interprete" are stunning.

But we can't leave the rest of the band out on the street; Gutman, Murphy, and Johnston contribute just as much musically as Sciubba. Gutman in particular plays a strong role in the sound of many of these songs; as they jump from genre to genre he always adds a bit of his own in the keyboard or electronic work. "Losing Myself" features a one chord Manzarek-channeled keyboard piece, as does "Ricardo." Murphy's bass line on dance numbers like "Internacional" are unforgettable, and Johnston's drumbeats make some of the otherwise un-danceable cuts danceable. New York City is a flurry of musical inspirations and even steps up to the plate to imitate Kid A at points like the spongey computer backing on "L'Interprete." The carnival-romp of "Berlin" or near-mechanically charged "I Want Out" make for strange - albeit grand - changes of pace. The band's incorporation of jazz, pop, rock, and most importantly electronica are so well fused that they truly stand out against the backdrop of mediocre indie-electronica acts. They know their music and have done their homework, and that's what makes New York City work. (St. Petersburg, Losing Myself, Berlin, L'Interprete)

Show Review: Coheed and Cambria @ Myrtle Beach 8/09/08

On Saturday I went to see Coheed and Cambria at the House of Blues with my friends Erin and Maggie (Stephen - whom I saw Dave Matthews with - was supposed to go but shit came up). The three of us will be seeing the Black Keys later in October, possibly with my friend Matt whom I saw Radiohead with earlier in May. As with Dave Matthews, I've never really listened to Coheed, but even less so Coheed. I had the intention of listening to their catalogue before we went to the show, but I was too lazy to do it. Thankfully, Maggie hadn't listened to them much, either. Coheed is Erin's favorite band, so we went.

The band Russian Circles opened at 8:00. They were alright, I've never heard an instrumental metal band before, so it was interesting. The crowd ate it up, so goody for them. If you're a fan of the Sword you should check them out. The sound is similar, but of course, no words.

The House of Blues is fairly small, so we obviously had a great view. With Radiohead and Dave Matthews, I could see them, but they were tiny. Claudio Sanchez was maybe a hundred feet away from me. Probably would have hit me harder if I was a huge fan, but I'm sure Erin was ecstatic. The show was actually pretty good, and it went by very quickly, even though they played for nearly two hours. I'm not a heavy metal fan, but they had some progressive and pop sensibilities to them, so I was thoroughly entertained. Some will criticize Sanchez on the way he plays guitar, because he plays fast, a trait of metal guitar players. Still, it was fairly impressive.

8/09/08 House of Blues at Myrtle Beach, SC

First set: No World For Tomorrow, Gravemakers, Ten Speed, AFHA, The Suffering, Everything Evil>The Trooper>Devil in Jersey City, Feathers, Blood Red Summer, The Running Free, In Keeping Secrets

Encore: Welcome Home, The Final Cut

The setlist was impressive, and the best song was "Welcome Home," where Sanchez pulled out a double-neck Gibson and went nuts. "The Final Cut" was also interesting, featuring a very space-rock type feel. It was good up until the ten minute drum solo. I'd have to listen to Coheed's catalogue before I'd go see them again, but apparently our show was the last one before their epic sets in New York and LA where they'll be playing everything they've done thus far. Unfortunately the House of Blues doesn't allow cameras, so again we don't have any pictures. If you were there or have been to any of Coheed's concerts this year, let me know how you liked it!

Coheed and Cambria Myrtle Beach 8/09/08 - Road Blog

12:20 We stop at a Sheetz to put gas in the car, Erin nearly fills up using diesel. We order some nasty food from inside, my order takes about three years to make.

12:45 Pit stop at the Kinko's down the street so I can print out my ticket. I'm an idiot and forgot to do it in the office the day before. Have to pay a few bucks to use the internet and such. Erin and Maggie want to check their Facebook accounts.

1:14 Discussion of pet peeves arises. I tell the story of people I went to high school with, most notably the girl who always laughed at inside jokes that she did not understand, and another chick who "absorbed" things when she grabbed them. I demonstrate with a pack of cheese nips.

1:30 I ask Maggie what kind of music she listens to. Besides Phil Collins and Genesis, turns out she listens to a lot of modern British stuff. She likes the Arctic Monkeys, and I inform her about the Last Shadow Puppets and the Rascals.

1:40 "No Diggity" by Blackstreet comes on the radio. Erin and Maggie rock out accordingly. Somehow Prince and David Bowie enter the conversation, and I ask them why women are fascinated by them, especially Prince. Apparently being a huge rock god and standing at about five feet tall is hot.

1:45 Creed comes on the radio and we all laugh hysterically. I do my Scott Stapp impersonation.

1:56 I have to break the news to Maggie that Forrest Gump had AIDS, as did little Forrest. Erin says "Walker told me I have AIDS."

2:03 Erin and Maggie decide to take photos of themselves. They hold the camera out the window and the moonroof. "They're our MySpace pics!" they say. I doubt either of them even have a MySpace. We put on Consolers of the Lonely by the Raconteurs

2:07 We mock M. Night Shyamalan's movies.

2:20 I find a pair of Homer Simpson slippers in the back. Erin tells me that when you put them on, it looks like Homer is giving head to your leg.

2:27 We pass two billboards, one reads, "Don't read billboards? YOU JUST DID!" and the other is an advertisement for the U.S.S. North Carolina. Apparently seniors get a discount of one dollar. "But I served on this ship!" "Whatever, it's still only a dollar off, old man."

2:48 Erin and Maggie talk about their hatred of children and friends that have children.

2:54 We put in a mix CD. First song is "One Week" by Barenaked Ladies.

Mix CD Playlist:
1. Barenaked Ladies - One Week
2. My Morning Jacket - Highly Suspicious
3. Death Cab For Cutie - No Sunlight
4. Feist - I Feel It All
5. The Hold Steady - Stuck Between Stations
6. Hot Chip - Ready for the Floor
7. M.I.A. - Paper Planes
8. The Raconteurs - Intimate Secretary
9. MGMT - Time to Pretend
10. Death Cab For Cutie - Cath...
11. Beck - Loser
12. Gnarls Barkley - Crazy
13. My Morning Jacket - Evil Urges
14. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Give It Away
15. MGMT - The Youth

3:11 "Anal bum cover," "The rapist," "Condom thing," "Jap anus relations," and other celebrity Jeopardy references. Erin then talks about Journey and the album cover that shows their bulges.

3:20 Stop at a gas station/Subway to get drinks and pee. Yes, we peed and then drank more.

3:39 We leave and start heading down the highway. Erin realizes that she's in first gear.

4:13 We pass by a colossal amount of mini golf courses. Erin is outraged at some of the themes the courses use, most notably one that makes light of plane wrecks. I mock her by being offended by a dinosaur-themed course. Why? The dinosaurs are all dead.

4:29 We find the House of Blues. Erin takes a photograph.

4:43 Stop at Logan's for dinner. We prepare for Coheed by ordering the Porterhouse 20oz raw and a bucket of blood.

6:00 We get in line and the doors open at 7:00. There is a weird guy in front of us who keeps staring and is trying to be part of our oh-so-funny conversations.

7:00 Doors open.

7:12 We finally get inside. We struggle to find a place to stand. Weird guy follows us up the stairs. We stand on the main floor on the stairs and have a really good view. Weird guy is off to the far side so we can keep an eye on his movements.

8:00 The opener, Russian Circles, comes out (on the stage, not of the closet).

9:00 Coheed starts to play and everyone goes nuts. There's a small Asian chick in front of us with her boyfriend and they never stop making out. There is a large sweaty chick next to me who can't sing.

Set List:
No World For Tomorrow (Epic intro with lights)
Gravemakers
Ten Speed
AFHA
The Suffering
Everything Evil>The Trooper>Devil in Jersey City
Feathers
Blood Red Summer
The Running Free
In Keeping Secrets

Encore:
Welcome Home (Claudio comes out with a white Gibson EDS-1275)
The Final Cut (Lasts nearly half an hour, fairly awesome)

10:44 Show ends and we head out. Looks like people enjoyed it but might be drained due to a ten minute drum solo on the last song.

11:01 Heading out of the parking lot. We see a car that has the words "Show Tits" duct taped on the door. Maggie takes a photograph and one of the guys talks to her through a megaphone.

11:16 On the road. We eventually stop at a gas station to fill up. The rest of the night is spent in deep conversation interspersed with dick jokes. Narrow Stairs plays the entire ride back.

Randy Newman - Harps and Angels

Harps and Angels (2008, Nonesuch) Randy Newman's eighteenth studio album. ****

For a long time, Randy Newman has been quite the unorthodox singer-songwriter. While unique, his voice isn't as pretty as Elton John. While stimulating, his messages aren't as strong as Bob Dylan. During the 70's and 80's, Newman made a name for himself, with such tunes as "Short People" and "It's Money That Matters," among many others. And during these runs he was able to maintain a fair amount of critical acclaim. In the mid-90's, however, Newman transitioned and found strength in writing children's music, as he would write soundtracks for the renowned Pixar films. After all this, Newman has gone back to more of his roots in making Harps and Angels.

Everything here is very simple and presented in Newman's pre-electric blues and ragtime stylings. And his trademark vocals are still as enthralling (and at the same time, goofy) as they've ever been. But here Newman has gone back to making political observations. The difference being that instead of semi-firey blasts of songs like some of his work in the 80's, Newman has the "aw, shucks" approach; mainly, he presents himself as a simple guy who is telling it like he sees it. And it works. "A Few Words in Defense of Our Country" finds Newman sarcastically comparing our government leaders to others of times past, saying how even though they're terrible, they're not nearly as bad as others in history. On comparing Bush and company to the Caesars, remarks "And one of 'em appointed his own horse Consul of the Empire/That's like Vice President or something/That's not a very good example, is it?"

He likens that to solve our education problems we should hire Korean parents for all students, who are "Strict but fair," that the rich are getting richer, and that we should all just smile in the faces of our leaders, as they wouldn't know how to respond. Newman is truly a master of songcraft, and all the tunes here are very delicate, and not all politically charged. "Potholes" is an amusing tale of wanting to forget embarrassing encounters, and "Feels Like Home" is the album's emotionally sweeping closer. While the dynamics are only lighthearted, it's still an album that's for sharing among friends, and Newman excellently portrays himself as the simple old-timer telling stories by the fire. A very welcome entry from an underrated performer. (Laugh and Be Happy, A Few Words in Defense of Our Country, Potholes)

Matt Pryor - Confidence Man

Confidence Man (2008, Vagrant) Matt Pryor's first studio album. ***

After the Get Up Kids disbanded in 2005, Pryor hasn't just been mulling around and twiddling his thumbs. He's been working on a delicate set of acoustic songs, all nicely tucked away into his solo debut Confidence Man. It's nothing groundbreaking and it doesn't fully recognize Pryor as any songwriting genius; all of these are still two-to-three minute numbers that aren't necessarily skillfully played. But what Pryor is going for is feeling, and occassionally he makes it work. Among the dribble of unintentional filler is "Loralai," an innocent piece with a beautiful harmony. "Confidence Man" is the best out of the bunch, with a swaying, easy summer afternoon felt harmonica, inspired by a mix of Bob Dylan and Ben Folds. And while the rest comes straight from Pryor's own mediocre sound, it's still something he put his heart into, and for that it's respectable.

Darker My Love - 2

2 (2008, Dangerbird) Darker My Love's second studio album. ****

Doing modern psychedelic music is a pretty tough act; drugs like LSD aren't nearly as commonly used as they were back in the late 60's, and most of the bands that did psychedelic music were self-indulgent. But modern bands such as MGMT and the Black Angels have tried to bring it back, and now another band, Darker My Love, has stepped up to the plate.

2 offers an eclectic mix of influences in its bag, with phases of the album exerting different sounds. The beginning is riff-heavy and recalls bands such as the Guess Who, especially on "Blue Day," which features a Steppenwolf-like sputtering organ. The Beatles and Cream show through on "White Composition," which has a jazzy drumbeat and a soft, rolling guitar melody. And an obvious tribute is paid to the Beatles on "Talking Words," which drops its excesses and features a deliberate imitation of Paul McCartney thirty seconds before it's out. 2 almost suffers from conjuring the sounds of too many influences (from the Velvet Underground to Radiohead), but the songs are so well crafted that it's hard to knock them. In fact, there are several moments that mark the music as primal; the airy psychedelic pop of "Even in Your Lightest Day" features a very chunky bass line, and "Northern Soul" has releases in its "Yeah yeah yeah's" that make the feeling organic. While there are no super-overdrawn "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vidas," some jams still take too much time, such as the Verve-inspired "All the Hurry and Wait," who's string arrangement is somewhat similar "Bittersweet Symphony," though it is still compelling. Surely they've some work to do, but 2 is still worth the listen, for several moments are magnificent. (Blue Day, Even In Your Lightest Day, All the Hurry and Wait)

YouTube Update

The latest reviews on my YouTube channel:
www.youtube.com/user/politicianrock

Entry #12: One Day as a Lion - One Day as a Lion
Entry #11: Nine Inch Nails - The Slip
Entry #10: Death Cab For Cutie - Narrow Stairs
Entry #9: Radiohead - In Rainbows Part 2
Entry #8: Radiohead - In Rainbows Part 1
Entry #7: The Black Keys - Attack & Release

What it is,
Stephen

Miley Cyrus - Breakout

Breakout (2008, Disney) Miley Cyrus' first studio album. ***

It's a little bit of a surprise that Miley Cyrus' first album outside of the "Hannah Montana" persona isn't awful. In fact, it's pretty good. And that's saying a lot, as teen pop has proven to be one of the worst factions of the pop and rock world, second only to Christian rock. The genre only received another blow with Katy Perry's horrific One of the Boys, a confused and contrived ordeal that was exactly what the intended audience didn't need to hear; getting wasted, sleeping with guys, and kissing chicks and liking it. Hey, experimentation is great, I understand, but the target market is middle-school girls, and there are enough poor role models for them as it is (Paris, Britney, and Lindsay, to name a few). Thankfully, Miley's album is nothing more than harmless, albeit mindless, pop sensibilities.

Every song shows one of two sides of Miley; her spunky side displayed on tunes such as the parent-defying title track or the Avril Lavigne-esque "7 Things I Hate About You," and her solemn side on cuts like "The Driveway," "Bottom of the Ocean," and "Goodbye." And while almost every track is predictable, the quality of the music itself is sometimes surprising. "The Driveway," for instance, portrays a doomed couple riding in a silent car, the awkward ride home we all know. And it's tracks like that, along with "Bottom of the Ocean," (reminiscent of Michelle Branch) that really wouldn't be half-bad if the excess was all shed in favor of an acoustic guitar or piano. It's arguably quality stuff, but since this isn't an attempt to make art, it didn't come out the way it should have. But beyond the decent material, there's plenty that's cheesy. Her cover of "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" may not be great, but it certainly fits the mood and in no way separates itself from the rest of the tracks. The worst moment is "Wake Up America," a call to arms against global warming, something Miley admits to not having any knowledge about. Considering the material on the album (breakups and girls nights out) it's completely out of place. "Simple Song" features an eye-rolling "La la la la laa" part preceded by "Sing along, now!" So while Breakout is a step forward for Miley, it's still only the second step in a line of many. It's impressive that she helped pen most of these, and when she comes of age, she could be a very respected singer-songwriter. That is, of course, if she stops writing hilariously bad lines like "My parents say that I'm lazy/Gettin' up at 8AM's crazy."

Alejandro Escovedo - Real Animal

Real Animal (2008, Black Porch/Manhattan) Alejandro Escovedo's ninth studio album. ****

Alejandro Escovedo has a family tree rooted (no pun intended) in music, and while there are plenty of sons and daughters, nieces and nephews who have musical background but have no talent themselves, Escovedo isn't one of them. The album is simple, really; it's merely adult alternative pop/rock, and even though most albums in this genre are beyond mediocre and go fairly unnoticed by anyone under age thirty, Real Animal is wonderfully different. The accessibility of easy-rockers such as the opening "Always a Friend" or the slightly darker "Chelsea Hotel '78" open themselves up to people of all ages. The earnest "Sister Lost Soul" or the closer "Slow Down" reveal Escovedo's ability to be sincere. And it has its rocking moments as well, as the rolling riff of "Smoke" demonstrates in its start-and-stop guitar and bass work. There's nothing complex here, it's just a great package of songs with decent production put out to entertain. Fans of jam bands, chill music, party music, and good music in general will find pleasure in Escovedo's simple elegance. Highly recommended. (Always a Friend, Chelsea Hotel '78, Sister Lost Soul, Smoke)

Has Rolling Stone Lost Its Touch?

People have been making the claim that Rolling Stone has been losing its touch essentially since their inception. At first it was easy for them to praise bands that were already established as greats since their slate was clean. But time has shown that they are capable at making horrific miscalculations as to the direction of music. The most infamous blunder was the scathing reviews that Led Zeppelin received. However, it should be noted that Jeff Beck's first album Truth was met with a certain amount of praise. Perhaps they believed that Led Zeppelin was nothing more than a ripoff of Beck's work. Is that the case? Well, kinda. Read for yourself. They are definitely deserving of some criticism to fail to see the differences between Truth and Led Zeppelin I, because even though they seemed minor, they were colossal.

The 90's then showed disdain for Nirvana, another band that would become a worldwide sensation and change the face of music. Again, Rolling Stone was called upon to answer for their mistake. Honestly, I personally don't blame them for dismissing Nirvana, as they were nothing more than a glorified version of the Pixies. Besides, grunge went on to inspire some really terrible music, and that's basically why there isn't any grunge left. Regardless, I'm not a professional critic, so my points are moot. In the end, Rolling Stone decided to recognize the "mistake" and include Nirvana's catalog in their list of the greatest 500 albums.

They also gave a lukewarm response to Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs, refused to put Rush on a cover for years because they weren't "cool" enough, bashed Wheels of Fire, and attempted to adopt hip-hop (which they previously dismissed) and criticized Jay-Z. But all of that was a while ago, surely Rolling Stone has gotten better in the past few years, right? Well, not exactly. The purpose of this article to to examine Rolling Stone reviews in the twenty-first century to see what they're getting right and, perhaps even more importantly, wrong. Considering the editors oversee the final rating of all albums, I won't hold the actual reviewer as solely responsible.

What they've been getting right:

Beck - Rolling Stone review of Modern Guilt

Since Beck's inception RS have been hitting the mark right. They give Beck his due credit without flattering him. Yes, Beck is a very good artist of our day, but it would be rather risky to call any album besides Odelay a classic.

Cat Power - Rolling Stone review of You Are Free

Chan Marshall has the ability to stray critics. Many see her as a cheap female imiation of Bob Dylan, but she's not. She's her own singer-songwriter, and a unique one at that. Her ability to compose and interpret music is impressive, and Rolling Stone have shown that they fully recognize that.

Death Cab For Cutie - Rolling Stone review of Narrow Stairs

A quirky group who has a catalog of hit-and-miss entries. Accordingly, Rolling Stone have either praised or scolded them, and they get it right.

M.I.A. - Rolling Stone review of Kala

On his own site, Robert Christgau gave Kala a perfect rating. Why RS didn't is odd, but either way, they gave it four-and-a-half and called it the best album of 2007. I'm not sure if I would say the same; I would have said it's a five-star album, but I also think it has fierce competition for album of the year from Neon Bible and In Rainbows. Still, they figured out M.I.A. is brilliant.

Other notable right calls:

Against Me! - New Wave

Band of Horses - Cease to Begin

Fleet Foxes - Fleet Foxes

LCD Soundsystem - Sound of Silver

The White Stripes - Elephant

Questionable ratings:

Arcade Fire - Rolling Stone review of Neon Bible

I understand that three-and-a-half stars is a good rating, but Neon Bible is beyond excellent. It's perfect; a classic album easily. However, they believe that not all the tunes work, and that maybe Funeral was better. Do the Springsteen influences shine through too hard? No, I think it's exaggerated.

My rating of Neon Bible - *****

Feist - Rolling Stone review of Let It Die and The Reminder

These are iffy. RS has nothing against Feist, but then again, each review seems to be a little low for what they should actually be rated. Let It Die is more acceptable than The Reminder, which is tough to break at first, but reveals itself after several listens, all of which are well deserved.

My rating of Let It Die - ****1/2

My rating of The Reminder - ***1/2

Gnarls Barkley - Rolling Stone review of St. Elsewhere

I wouldn't have picked on RS for this one had they given it even just a slightly higher rating. It's obvious to everyone that St. Elsewhere was better than The Odd Couple, even though the latter was still a close second.

My rating of St. Elsewhere - ****

Other notable questionable calls:

Lily Allen - Alright, Still

The Raconteurs - Consolers of the Lonely

Thom Yorke - The Eraser

The White Stripes - De Stijl

What they got wrong:

Amy Winehouse - Rolling Stone review of Back to Black

Christian Hoard, in an otherwise positive review, ends by saying "the tunes don't always hold up." Certainly he listened to it more than once, as Back to Black is an absolutely gorgeous album. There are few albums now - or in history, for that matter - that are as genuine in emotion as this one. And considering she's the only artist who is mixing 60's Motown with neo-soul and R&B - actual R&B - is incredible. Know why? Because she understands soul and jazz, she was brought up on it. If she doesn't die, she'll be a legend. A three-star review pitiful on their part.

My rating of Back to Black - ****1/2

Ben Folds - Rolling Stone review of Rockin' the Suburbs

Another three-star review of a near-classic album. Ben Folds used to be someone I almost couldn't listen to, but thankfully I got over myself and realized how brilliant he really is. He's the next step in piano rock, as John and Joel are practically retired. This release is Folds' magnum opus (as of now) and is far better than anything he did in Ben Folds Five.

My rating of Rockin' the Suburbs - ****1/2

The Black Keys - Rolling Stone review of Thickfreakness and Rubber Factory

Once again, three-star reviews all around. In all actuality, the first review isn't that bad, but Hoard's review of Rubber Factory again has completely missed the mark. It's missing tunes? I think you're missing ears, Mr. Hoard. Along with the White Stripes, the Black Keys are the only band that are true masters of the blues, music that is the foundation for everything we have today.

My rating of Thickfreakness - ****1/2

My rating of Rubber Factory - ****

Daft Punk - Rolling Stone review of Discovery

While they have no problem giving accolades to Moby, Rolling Stone have repeatedly given the middle finger to this French duo. We may have Robert Christgau to thank for that, who gave Homework a rather scalding review as well. Still, Christgau has come around to liking them, being very positive in response to Alive 2007. So why is Rolling Stone lagging?

My rating of Discovery - ****

The Mars Volta - Rolling Stone review of De-Loused in the Comatorium

Even I was scared of the Mars Volta after my first listen. I had never really heard anything like it before. But instead of putting it out of my mind I set a goal to understand it. I haven't done that yet, there are still several elements within the music of the Mars Volta that I don't grasp, but I can tell that they are geniuses at work. Who else but Mr. Hoard gave De-Loused a crap review.

My rating of De-Loused in the Comatorium - ****1/2

Other notable wrong calls:

Broken Social Scene - Broken Social Scene

Clinic - Internal Wrangler

The Kooks - Inside In/Inside Out

The Last Shadow Puppets - The Age of the Understatement

These are only a handful of ratings that Rolling Stone has made in the twenty-first century, and there are loads of grades that are correct, off by only a half-star, or completely wrong, far too many for me to post here. Either way, it's clear that for every correct thing that RS says, they have another that's way off. That wouldn't be so bad if they were able to justify themselves, but they don't. When asked to defend reviews after years gone by, they either admit the mistake and suddenly embrace the artist or keep completely silent. I'd rather they follow what one of their own writers, Robert Christgau, does. If he doesn't like something, he says why, even if the reason isn't that good. Christgau, while frustrating, at least sticks with what he believes. The same cannot be said about Rolling Stone. Writers for that magazine must ask themselves, do they really want their reviews read back to them fifteen years from now?

Duds of 2008: Part Four

Here are a handful of albums that hardly deserve a full-length review. Duds consist of albums that have received a rating of two stars or less. Didn't expect to have to do it again so soon, but man, there's a lot of bad music out there.

Scars On Broadway (2008, Interscope) Scars On Broadway's first studio album. *1/2

Scars On Broadway don't know if anyone takes them seriously, if they want to be taken seriously, or even if the band takes itself seriously. In fact, they don't seem to know much, including how to write music or that there's more than one chord you can play on a guitar, or, in their own words, how they're going to live forever if they're going to kill each other. They said it, not me.

We Have Cause to Be Uneasy (2008, Canvas Black) Wild Sweet Orange's first studio album. **

You know the people from Wild Sweet Orange, you've seen (but hopefully have not heard) them a million times; young pseudo-hippies who "get" music and "connect" with it more than other people, who boast of quasi-intellectual ideas and made-up memories, but it's okay, because it's all in the spirit of music. The problem? They suck.

@#%&*! Smilers (2008, Superego) Aimee Mann's seventh studio album. **

Nothing against Aimee Mann. Honestly. But this album is boring beyond belief. Look, in a world that is plagued with mediocre and stereotypical female singer-songwriters, you need to stand out. Insinuating a potty-mouth word in the title of your album isn't what I had in mind.